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Taming the Tongue

It was his first day on the job. He was a new clerk in the produce department of a large super market. A lady came up to him and said she wanted to buy half of a head of lettuce. He tried to dissuade her from that goal, but she persisted.

Finally, he said, “I’ll have to go back and talk to the manager.”

He went to the rear of the store to talk to the manager, not noticing that the woman was walking right behind him. When he got into the back of the store, he said to the manager, “There’s some stupid old bag out there who wants to buy half a head of lettuce. What should I tell her?”

Seeing the horrified look on the face of the manager, he turned about and, seeing the woman, added, “And this nice lady wants to buy the other half of the head of lettuce. Will it be all right?”

Considerably relieved, the manager said, “That would be fine.”

Later in the day, he congratulated the boy on his quick thinking. He then asked, “Where are you from, son?”

The young man said, “I’m from Toronto, Canada, the home of beautiful hockey players and ugly women.”

The manager looked at him and said, “My wife is from Toronto.”

The boy said, “Oh, what team did she play for?”[1]

Now I imagine that many of us wish that we were as quick-witted as that young man who worked in that grocery store. But the truth is, we aren’t. And our tongues usually get us into a whole lot of trouble.



That’s what our passage from James’ letter is all about this week. Listen for God’s Word to you from James 3:1-12…



Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers and sisters,[a] for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. 2 For all of us make many mistakes. Anyone who makes no mistakes in speaking is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check with a bridle. 3 If we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we guide their whole bodies. 4 Or look at ships: though they are so large that it takes strong winds to drive them, yet they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. 5 So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great exploits.



How great a forest is set ablaze by a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire. The tongue is placed among our members as a world of iniquity; it stains the whole body, sets on fire the cycle of nature,[b] and is itself set on fire by hell.[c] 7 For every species of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by the human species, 8 but no one can tame the tongue—a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9 With it we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse those who are made in the likeness of God. 10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers and sisters,[d] this ought not to be so. 11 Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and brackish water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brothers and sisters,[e] yield olives, or a grapevine figs? No more can salt water yield fresh.

James tells us a number of things in this passage. And the first thing he tells us is: not many of us should become teachers.

My alternate title for this sermon was: Why no one should have my job!

Anyone who stands up and talks in front of a group of people at least once per week, for twenty minutes or more, is bound to get into trouble.

Why? James tells us why. Because all of us make many mistakes. As someone once said, “Life is strewn with banana peels.” All of us slip up from time to time.

James goes on to say, “Anyone who makes no mistakes in speaking is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check with a bridle.”

The problem is: there is no such person. We all make mistakes in our speech. We all say things that get us and others into trouble, things that we wish we had not said, things that hurt others.

“Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Seldom has a more untrue saying been so widely circulated. The wounds caused by sticks and stones usually heal. The wounds caused by words sometimes never heal.

The truth is, the more talking we do, the more we often hurt others, and the more it is revealed how fallible we are as human beings.

So, let me save you some worry if you ever plan to come to me and point out where I have been wrong in something I have said. I will be most likely to agree with you and say, “Guilty as charged.” Or if not that, I will always say, “Yes, I could have been wrong.” And I will say that because I am a fallible human being just like everyone else here, except for the fact that I am more likely to get in trouble with my tongue than you are, simply because I use my tongue more, in front of more people, than most of you do.

But let’s look deeper into what James tells us about all of our tongues. James tells us at least four things about the tongue in this brief passage.

First, the tongue is like a bit in the mouth of a horse.



Now my wife will confirm for you that I know next to nothing about horses. By contrast, she knows a lot.



I well remember the first time I rode a horse. It was at my aunt and uncle’s ranch. My uncle raised Arabians that he rode in the Rose Parade every year. I was probably 12 or 13 years old when they invited me to ride a horse at their ranch. My ride took place completely within a fenced-in area. What could go wrong?



The ride downhill to the end of the paddock went just fine. The horse and I were going along at a very slow pace. But then when the horse turned around, he did his usual thing and galloped back up to the top of the paddock. I got so scared I lost hold of the reins and grabbed on to the only thing I could: the horn of the saddle. It is amazing I did not fall off.



Now, if I had known anything at all about horseback riding at that time, I should have known that keeping hold of the reins was essential, because that is part of how you can control the direction and speed of the horse by use of the bit and bridle.



By drawing the comparison to horseback riding, James is telling us that our tongues (just like a bit and bridle with a horse) can direct the course of our lives.



Let me give you an example of this from my own life… In 1991, I had just completed work on a citywide evangelistic campaign with evangelist Luis Palau, a campaign (by the way) which never fully came to be. Be that as it may, I was living in Southern California at the time and wondering what God wanted me to do next with my life.



One day, in the middle of my search, I got a call from the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. Sterling Huston, the director of Mr. Graham’s meetings in North America was on the other end of the line. He wanted to know if I wanted to come to work for them. It sounded to me like the dream of a lifetime. The longer we talked, the more excited I got.



Then Mr. Huston asked me a question. He said something to the effect of: “What do you most want to do with your life?” Without hesitation I said, “Preach the good news of Jesus Christ.”



Sterling Huston’s response to that was, “Then that is what you should be doing, young man.”



After thanking me for my time, that phone call came quickly to an end. And I never heard from the Billy Graham Team again.

What happened? I can tell you exactly what happened. It’s like Jesus says, “for it is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45) The greatest desire of my heart at that time was to be a preacher. And so that’s what came out of my mouth.



Sterling Huston wasn’t looking for more preachers. He had plenty of them. He was looking for an organizer. And that wasn’t me.



At that point in time, the words from my own mouth guided the direction of my life. The words from our mouth often direct the course of our lives, sometimes in good directions, sometimes in bad.



The second thing James tells us is that the tongue is like the rudder on a ship.



It is as if James says here, “If you don’t like one illustration, let me give you another.” One word-picture after another pours forth from James’ pen.



Just as a rudder is a (relatively) small thing that guides even a big ocean liner, so the tongue, even though it is a small thing, can guide our entire lives. Or as James puts it: what tremendous effects the tongue can boast of!



My parents had a 40-foot yacht when I was young, and we often used to go out cruising, sometimes overnight, on the Pacific Ocean. On one occasion, our pastor, Louis Evans, Jr., and his family went out on our yacht with us for the day. Now Louis, despite being the pastor of one of the largest Presbyterian Churches in the country at that time, and later pastor of the National Presbyterian Church in Washington, DC, was quite a prankster. We had a lovely day out on the ocean, our two families together, and at the end of the afternoon we returned to the harbor where we kept our boat.



Now, our yacht had two bridges—a flying bridge directly above the main bridge and neither one was visible to the other. My father was at the helm on the flying bridge and trying to guide our yacht into the very narrow dock where it was kept. Meanwhile, Louis, unbeknownst to my father, was at the other helm just below him, steering the ship in a different direction.



My father eventually cottoned on to what was happening. However, he thought my brother was the culprit. So, he bellowed, “Roger!” Meanwhile, Louis slinked away from the helm and never admitted to his mischief.



Sometimes we may feel like we have all good intentions of saying just the right thing, and guiding our life in a certain direction, when underneath, we feel another power at work. We will talk more about that in a moment.



The third thing James tells us is that the tongue is a fire. We all know that a huge forest fire can be set ablaze by one match. Just so, the tongue can start a very dangerous verbal fire.



How is the tongue like a fire? In two ways, at least. For one thing, the effect of fiery words can be wide-ranging. Words can kill from a distance, just like a flaming arrow.



Tom Wright has said,



We know only too well, from the way the media eagerly trip up politicians and other public figures, that one word out of place can ruin a career or bring down a government. One unwise remark, reported and circulated on the Internet, can cause riots the other side of the world. So, says James, the tongue is like a little world all of its own, a country within a country: the larger area, the person as a whole, may be well governed, but in this smaller region corruption and wickedness reign unchecked.

I am sure that we are all tempted to think of a certain politician for whom this description is spot on. But the more important thing is that we should use James’ words, like a spotlight, to illumine the dark places in our own lives.

Secondly, the tongue is like a fire in that it is uncontrollable. Fires in Israel are like fires in Southern California. It doesn’t take much before they are out of hand and burn thousands of acres. It has been said that there are three things that don’t come back: the spent arrow, the spoken word, and the lost opportunity. There is nothing so impossible to kill as a rumor. If you have ever been the victim of gossip, it should make you never want to inflict gossip on anyone else. The words we speak can do tremendous damage in the lives of others, perhaps our words can do greater damage than any forest fire.

The fourth thing that James says is that the tongue is placed among our members as a world of iniquity; it stains the whole body, sets on fire the cycle of nature,[b] and is itself set on fire by hell.

So, James is telling us that the tongue can set other things on fire. As John Maxwell says, everyone carries around with them two buckets. One is filled with gasoline. The other is filled with water. The question is, “Which one are you going to pour on the little fires you see in everyday life?”

James also tells us that the tongue itself is set on fire by hell. The word that James uses here for “hell” is an interesting one. It is used 12 times in the New Testament. 11 of those instances are in the Gospels where we hear this word from the lips of Jesus. The twelfth, and only other, usage of this word is in James. The word in Greek is “Gehenna” and it is a transliteration from a Hebrew word that means the Valley of Hinnom.

Now, the Valley of Hinnom was to the southwest of Jerusalem, just outside the wall of the city, and it was the place where they burned garbage. Also, long before the time of Jesus, this was the place where child sacrifice took place.

James undoubtedly remembered Jesus’ use of this term, and (in essence) he is saying, “The tongue is set on fire by the burning garbage heap!” It is like the saying, “Garbage in, garbage out.” If we take garbage into our minds and hearts and souls, that is what will come out of our lips.

Finally, James says, no mere human being can tame the tongue. It is an amazing thought, but it is true. Human beings have tamed every kind of creature. But what mere human being has ever tamed his or her tongue? James calls it a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

James finds what the tongue does to be very unnatural. With the tongue we can bless God in church, but as soon as we walk out the door, or maybe even sooner, we can speak words of cursing against our fellow human beings who are made in God’s image.

James says that we should not be like this. James’ brother Jesus said, “Bless those who curse you.” (Luke 6:28) Find something good to say, even about your enemies.

James gives two final examples of why blessing and cursing coming from the same tongue is so unnatural. He asks the rhetorical question: “Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and brackish water?” Of course not. A spring may do one or the other but not both in alternation. And like someone once said, “It is no help to paint the pump if poisoned water is coming from the well.” We can all pretend to be nicer than we really are. But God is not interested in our pretended niceness. God wants to change us from the inside out.

James’ second rhetorical question is: Can a fig tree, my brothers and sisters, yield olives, or a grapevine, figs? Of course not, he says. Neither can salt water yield fresh.

So, what are we to do about the problem of the tongue? There is only one solution. If no human being can tame their own tongue, then we each need help from outside ourselves. And James has already suggested twice in his letter, who it is who can help us to tame our tongues. It is James’ brother, the Lord Jesus Christ. Why not let Jesus be the Lord, the Sovereign, the One in charge of your tongue, and your whole life for that matter?



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